Choking Hands

I want to scream and scream out so loud that someone stops to take notice. I woke up sweating, on my back, choking with the phlegm in my throat. I was screaming NO!!! and his HUGE hands were around my neck. I had to drag myself out of that unconscious state and tell myself to get out of bed NOW! I did not want to live through that again.

The tears started to roll down my face, as I got up, and I started to shake. It is time to record these nightmares, that don't leave me alone. Maybe by writing these down, I will find some comfort. I want peace in my life.

I have not realized the impact of what I lived through and what I have shelved in the recesses of my mind, has had on my life. The impact on MY life, is only surfacing. I am starting to remember more and more things I never wanted to remember. I have questioned myself for years, as to why I have been so unproductive. I have not been unproductive, I have been surviving!